Monday, 23 February 2015

Wall There In My House

You know those things in your life that are just so incredibly innocuous?

Like, the smell of your own house, or the colour of your garden fence.

The things that are a part of your life and help to comprise the texture of the very world in which you live. Indeed, the texture of the parts of the world which are closest to you.

These things are such a great part of your life that they go completely unnoticed.

You know things like these like the back of your hand: You’ve seen them so many numerous times that, whilst they are a part of you, you stop noticing them and they don’t interest you and you probably couldn’t call them to mind with any great amount of detail other than a vague description.

“Ohh, yeah, the backs of my hands. Well, erm… they’re like… my hands, but, y’know… the backs…”

Well, I just noticed something like that in my life recently. Something that had registered in my brain as existing without meriting any great inspection.

A wall.

My home has many walls. It’s quite necessary.

They help to keep the outside out and the inside in.

I of course know where these walls are. I need to know that so I don’t walk into them.

But there’s just one wall, in the kitchen next to the fridge. On the other side of the wall there’s nothing, no house attached to it, just air and the neighbours’ garden. It’s the wall about 2 feet from the dinner table, probably closer.

And, for about the first time in… for the first time, I actually looked at it. Not just saw it, as a big white blob out of the corner of my eye, but looked at it.

It was surprisingly trippy, given that it is just an ordinary wall.

My first thought was pretty stupid: “Who put that wall there?”

It’s not that I was surprised that there would be a wall there. As I mentioned, it’s reasonable – indeed, advisable – for a house to have walls. I was just kind of weirded out. It’s a chunk of the house i’d seen, but never saw.

The next thought I had was about whether or not the wall was even real. At that moment it was kind of surreal.

So I reached out to touch the mysterious wall. And suddenly the wall seemed alot bigger than it had.

I suppose it was because the wall had only just started appearing to me as an actual physical object. Suddenly it’s not just a hazy, white blob, it’s a solid wall. On the other side of it there’s air and wind and two feet away from it on our side there’s me.

This of course meant that I took in the full size of it. It’s about 8 feet high and 10 feet wide, maybe. 80 square feet. It’s big. Not as big as some walls, but bigger than others.

And I reached out, across the two feet that suddenly seemed like two miles. It made me realise that there’s alot of empty space between the table and the wall. We could push the two together, make the kitchen seem roomier.

I prodded the wall, cautiously.

I wasn’t sure what was going to happen. Maybe the wall would have become all ghostly and translucent and allowed my hand to pass right through. Maybe it would have stretched like elastic and bounced back into place afterwards, like something out of the matrix.

But it remained a big cream-coloured block of solid wall. No give in it at all.

I’m not sure why the wall caught me by surprise, and why it was even a revelation that it actually existed. Maybe it’s just the remnants of the brief burst of flu I had burning themselves out and making me delirious as a result.

I thought we needed to decorate the wall, so I don’t suddenly forget it exists. Luckily, my friend bought a cute li’l sign to hang on it today. It reads:
“Remember: As far as anyone else is concerned, we’re a nice, normal family.”

I really like it. And it will help me not to forget that there is a big, flat, vertical surface to my left when i’m eating.

So there we have it guys. A wall snuck up on me.

Now I know how he felt.

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